Which “exotic” destination at a 3 hours flying range from Brussels I haven’t been yet to ? Which destination would make me look like as a “weirdo” to my fellows, developing the wildest fantasies, when mentioning about it ?

UKRAINE, of course !

Ok, frankly speaking, my dreams of an unfriendly-unsafe-soviet-maffia-shithole got quickly disappointed…
- no “2-months-in-advance” visa (for EU citizens at least, upon arrival) were requested to enter the country (yep, Ukraine is not “Russia”)
- “rightly” considered as a safe country (level 1 ; the maximum) by the Belgian Foreign Affairs Ministry (WHAT???)

But (fortunately),
- the latest (very thin) edition of the Lonely Planet guide was from 2006 (good feeling, they don’t make any yearly issue, the demand must be very low, just the necessary information should be covered then), c’mon trucker/secretary backpackers, go to Croatia
- no-one overthere really speaks English (speak Russian, Ukrainian, or have fun with your hands),
- everything is in Cyrillic (good luck in restaurants) - again, having a pretty ok level in Russian definitely helps… a lot.
- alcohol is pretty expensive (Western Europe level), including clubs and everything linked to nightlife (your budget * 2)
- western tourism is not that much developed (usually all tourists come from Russia and Belarus), so if you are in troubles, have fun with… (if you have any left one :)… !
- …

I lOVE UKRAINE. I LOVE KIEV.

Gentle and curious people, lovely food (really), splendid architecture, amazing countrysides (Crimea is just surreal), Orthodox churches there are just about spirituality - a dimension I believe my Belgian catholic churches is currently missing. Kiev is actually considered as a holy place in the orthodox world, it is as well the historical origin of the Russian empire. A bit like Philadelphia/ Boston for the US… except those cities are still part of the US.

I felt like being home in Kiev, and I hope I’ll be able to go back there with a better level of Russian (probably when I’ll be able to sing these songs by heart ; Kalinka and Katyusha). I got my stereotypes completely broken ; “no-one” there smoke (no young people at least) - which is a premiere in developing countries (usually this is completely the opposite), and the lesser you drink, the better you are considered (even if you could notice “everyone” is carrying/drinking bottles of beer on the streets). After this trip experience, I got convinced that smoking was just so stupid (even when drunk, I just don’t want to scap a fag anymore - smoke in my lungs, not anymore).

But well, this paradise might again anytime soon to the westerners close its doors (maybe for a better) - politically, as you might have read on the news, it is indeed not going that well. I can see critical community and identity problems appearing (Russian speakers vs Ukraine ones), fostered by the 2 totally different neighboring worlds (European Union VS Russia). Torn apart, that might be a probable ending for this country that has already suffered so much (”special treatments” from Nazis and Soviets)… The world has indeed evolved since Yalta, when Roosevelt, Churchill and Staline split the world ; where will this city stand in 10 years time ?

First, chose your music version, through either Youtube, Dailymotion or Metacafé.
Then, help yourself with the alphabet below, or go straight to the transliteration - try to learn this song with the real alphabet (anyway you’ll need to master it before your journey)… if you want to carry on your immersion, have a look as well to Калинка, Kalinka

First, chose your music version, through either Youtube, Dailymotion or Metacafé.
Then, help yourself with the alphabet below, or go straight to the transliteration - try to learn this song with the real alphabet (anyway you’ll need to master it before your journey)…I you want to carry on your absorption of Russian culture, have a look to Катюша, Katyusha…

1. Brussels becomes part of Flanders ? I would hardly accept this idea - even if I speak Flemish, my mother tongue is French. Language Diversity (a concept I care a lot) might be at risk. On the other hand, if Brussels becomes part of Flanders, and if the UN, EU institutions make their job, Flanders might be coerced to become a bilingual entity (Brussels or the poison pill:-). This might be funny to try (but the joke might be for a short while).

2. Brussels becomes the first European state directly ruled by the European Commission? I would hardly accept this idea (being governed by a Greek, or a Swedish, or any other European citizen except a native). On the other hand, not so far ago (175 years ago), we were used to be ruled by Dutch, French, Austrian, Spanish,… during centuries). It would be a pretty big administration for such a small city though

3. Brussels becomes part of Wallonia ? Walloons speak French, we share common media (TV and newspapers). But do I want Brussels to be managed like Charleroi ? Sorry this was easy, but well, the most populated city of Wallonia is not really an example of transparency.

4. “Wallonia-Brussels” becomes part of France ? French speaks French, we share common media (TV and newspapers). But do I want a Sarkozy-Bruni duet as a royal example ? Ok, frankly, I don’t care, but Language Diversity (a concept I care a lot about) might be at risk in this case (I love speaking other languages).

5. Wallonia becomes part of Luxembourg (or maybe Wallonia takes over Luxemburg) ? In Luxembourg, 3 national languages. They are friendly, a bit rough, but friendly, they know how to manage business, and make money… mmmh why not, I’d like to explore this idea. A future country with 4 national languages, good governance, still some royal family… from a cultural point of view, it might be very powerful…

6. Wallonia, like Brussels becomes part of a “European federation entity”, under commandment of the EC. This might get very funny, but could open huge opportunities (an open-air laboratory on how to boost a whole region, a “EU flagship”, where ideas will be directly put into practice). On the other hand, the country is paralyzed by a very complex decision apparel, economy is not flourishing, entrepreneurship is still considered as a strange concept. Tough challenge,… would be these 16 844 km² be ready to become a Multicultural chaos ?

7. The Netherlands become part of Flanders (I know this is a bit cynic) ? Dutch speak a very close language to Flemish. But do you seriously believe Flemish would like to be called “Dutch” (I mean Hollanders being called Flemish?) ? There is after all a deep cultural gap (Flemish are mainly catholics, and Dutch protestants), and anyway The Netherlands will not accept to be called “Flanders”. This could constitute though one of the most powerful economic bloc… since Flanders would leave out Wallonia because of the money…

In the case some hurdles happen (at the “linguistic border”), if things get serious, I sell everything (I have nothing) and will live somewhere else, abroad (making money and surviving is hard enough) - maybe I’ll be entitled to get a US / Australian nationality ? Cool perspective (but please, not Arkansas)… Little Belgium between little Armenia and Little Italy…

I don’t bloody care about the results of my national football team (ok, maybe except woman tennis), but I don’t mind watching a football match - I actually support the Dutch team (thanks to Overmars, so small, so fast).

I usually play low key when mentioning my origins (”born in Brussels”, that’s it, next?). My nationality is not a big deal when exchanging with “foreigners” (funny concept as well btw…).

I don’t know any Belgian folk songs by heart (and actually any songs), even if I enjoy listening at them (like any other songs from any other country). If it is possible to dance on it, I’ll be the first on the floor.

I don’t know my national anthem by heart (just the main chorus ; “le roi, la loi, la liberté” (”the king, the law, the freedom”) - ready to sing for freedom though). The English and the French ones sound great.

Even if I’m a French native speaker, I am fluent in two other languages (and basics in 5 others), I like to speak them all, alternatively, during the day. English is the new Lingua Franca, it’s a tool, a commodity. Dutch is a part of myself.

I prefer the taste of Czech beer (”Krusovice cerny” is my favorite), Belgian chocolate is fine, but I wouldn’t kill for it.

they are nice people everywhere (in Belgium and abroad). They are *ssh*les everywhere as well.

Oh, yes, I forgot,… Belgium has a government now where nearly all important political parties who competed during these elections, have gained official responsibilities (15 ministries from left to Flemish secessionist far-right sides - Mexican Army, here we are…)… opposition ? Funny Belgian concept… “concertation”, you mean.

Identity like national I.D. - if your personality were limited to what is written on this piece of plastic, I don’t think I would spend a sincere time with you (I might politely listen at you though).
Believe it or not, but this is my profession of faith as a Belgian. Keeping my eyes opened to other ways of thinking, learning from them, the world is big enough… up to you if you want to be considered as a cattle. In my country, we sell (specific) weapons (and bloody good ones) to (selected) third world countries (it is just for business of course), but we don’t use them at home… not legal for civilians to own one… we can make more money in other ways.

In the case of some hurdles in Belgium (split of the country, demonstrations). I’ll check what’s going on - if things get serious (which would sincerely surprise me), I sell everything (easy, I have nothing) and will live somewhere else, abroad (making money and surviving is hard enough) in a more peace minded country - maybe I’ll be entitled to get an Australian nationality ? Cool perspective… Little Belgium between little Armenia and Little Italy in Sidney… but don’t ask me to shoot on my neighbor because he speaks another language, and because we did not manage to communicate together. It is not because buying a gun is less time consuming, it brings a clever and long-lasting solution… and anyway I can’t really shoot.